Notes from Myreside

There are three things on my mind this week.

1) Apologies to Greig Scott. Video evidence suggests his sprint to the line for his try against Watsonians was more in the region of forty-five yards than the thirty-five suggested in my match report. As a forward who doesn't get the ball over the line too often, I'm sure Greig will be claiming every one of the hard yards his gangly legs carried him.

On the subject of Mr. Scott, it's great just to see him back playing. There was a time during his spell out when I wondered if he might go the same way as another lock forward at the club, Ally Ness, but he's shown great spirit to overcome his shoulder problems and right now he's playing as well as he ever has.

Like the rest of 'Muir's forwards, he had a wonderful game against Watsons. They systematically took their Myreside opponents apart and by the end of the game had a level of domination that was, quite frankly, staggering. I wasn't sure under the new rules whether it was going to be possible to see one side drive another back some thirty metres via superb use of the rolling maul, but that's exactly what we saw about an hour into Saturday's match. It was an example of just how superior 'Muir's pack were on the day.

2) When, as they did on Saturday, Boroughmuir play well and show a distinct superiority over their opponents, the Senior WebMonkey starts acting like the Energizer Bunny on crack. Seriously, he bounces around more excited than an eight year-old with ADHD, but it is nice at least to see that it all matters so much to the old man.

During the games he takes notes on a Dictaphone, from which I later write the match report. If it's clear from early on that 'Muir are going to win, and from the time Ed Mills cut a perfect angle to finish off Greg Cottrell's searing break on Saturday, it was that clear, his notes become more and more infused with hyperbole as the match progresses. By the end of the tape I was expecting to hear, "Bring on Toulouse, we'd take those French numpties, nae problem."

3) The refereeing performance during the match on Saturday was, shall we say, baffling. It was noted by more than a few people during the match that the three WebMonkys (Auxiliary Monkey joined us after he finished work) were none too amused at some of the decisions made by Mr. Healy of GHA; we each yelled ourselves horse at the Baldy Whistler.

I'm in no way accusing the man of being biased, I'm sure that if I were a Watsonians fan (perish the thought) I would have been just as stumped in trying to fathom some of his decisions in 'Muir's favour, but there were some absolute shockers.

I could sit here for hours and list some of his bizarre calls, but it'll suffice to say that I think both Ed Mills and Neil Malloy were unlucky to be shown yellow cards - though not as unlucky as Joni Hare, who didn't even get on the pitch but had Bill Lothian reporting that it was he, not Malloy, who was sent to the sin bin - and I was never aware that there was an offside line in open play. In fact, I'm pretty sure there isn't. Maybe I'm wrong though, it could just have been an ELV that the IRB forgot to announce.